My Trip

I spent a lot of time sitting on Grandma's bed. Just holding her hand, sometimes talking to her, but with others in the room, I didn't want them to see me cry.

Grandma couldn't talk mosdt of the time. She would repeat something like "Hey" if she was confused. I don't think she knew who I was when I was sitting there. That made me cry even more.

So I sat. And held her hand, and stroked her arm. Her skin was transparent. When my fingers moved up her skin would move with it and when they went back down you could see all the wrinkles reform.

Carrie did her finger and toe nails yesterday. Bright red. Mom said she should go dancing.

I picked red leaves off the ground and trees. I put them in a soda can and placed it on Grandma's night stand. They're really pretty. I don't remember ever seeing the leaves change. I dreamt of being in a huge orchard and scooping all the leaves together and falling into the pile.